Once Upon a Time--- my perspective on daily life

Jan 05, 2018

And so, here we are. I think therefore I am... but my mortal shell cant hold it all so Im sharing some thoughts with the world. The plan is to jot down something every few days or week and see where we end up.

So today's thought- I think I will start a little slow and build to epic rants. The weather today is quit chill- 8' when I woke with 7-10 mph winds. Bailey loves this weather but I have to watch him, he doesn't know when to stop. Kind of like me on some subjects. But the sun is shining and if i poke my head out from under the blankets it does look amazing out there. Sue Creek is frozen over and thick enough for large dogs now. I expect by February it will be thick enough for me.

Many people are clammering about Climate Change and mankind's affect on a global scale. I don't doubt that climate change is occurring. And that man has some affect on it. But that's a long way from choosing to destroy certain industries (and the families that depend on them) or making dramatic and sudden changes to our lives. I don't think that we can honestly say what's going in. Climate is supposed to change. It is natures way of staying balanced. We may have tipped the balance. But forcing changes will also tip the balance.

That doesn't mean I am against the environment. I think we should focus on efficiency and that will subsequently help the world.

It's time to get some air. Until next time, Be Good Be Safe Learn Something (BGBSLS)!!

Jan 12, 2018

As another year passes me by I sit here reflecting on life's choices. We all make choices all the time. Some are as simple as what to wear or eat. Some are a bit more complicated like why is the absence of light black (easy answer but for another blog). Some have the results we imagine.... others result in something totally different. Sometimes we fail to make a choice and then our choices are made for us. And I get to the point that I can't understand why we don't take more credit for the choices we make? Not every choice is the right one... or turns out well. But the ability to choose for yourself is precious. And I have always believed that the journey is much more important than the destination. So try to be on a good path but the ends do not justify the means. Be accountable for what you do especially when it doesn't work the way you want. Be grateful that the journey continues. For none of us know whats on the other side.

Jan 17, 2018

Hello again. I'm watching the news and the morning and just shaking my head. Somehow our world has got to the point of destroying peoples lives cause someone 'felt uncomfortable'. The MeToo movement has triggered lots of good put has also opened a door for more of this "not my fault" rhetoric. I am shocked and dumbfounded how we as a society are so comfortable blaming others for our individual lack of responsibility. There is a huge difference in sexual assault/ sexual harassment and with misunderstandings or missed cues. If you don't want to be physical with someone, don't! People have the ability to say no and leave but for some reason they feel that others should just 'know' what is comfortable. And this falls along many levels of relationships. If you don't want to chat with someone, ask them to stop. If the person isn't paying enough attention to you, let them know. And it occurs in many other aspects of life. If the care is driving too slow, change lanes. If a restaurant doesn't serve a particular type of food, choose something else or leave. If a baker is uncomfortable with a particular design, choose one that is offered or go somewhere else. We all have the choice and responsibility to society to exercise our choices. There is nothing evil or mean about compromise and empathy. Speak up to be understood.... Not to change others.

I really hope the world starts to be accountable for individual actions and social empathy. And for the reactions that comes from antipathy and excessive actions.

Now, I'm gonna make some hot chocolate and watch the snow.

Jan 31, 2018

Im finding that I am having to find new ways to accomplish things that used to be taken for granted. But that's another blog.

It seems that the USA has forgotten what it took to get to this point. Our culture has become a disposable one. We go to fast food places, have 'deluxe' paper plates, change phones every year, have inferior produced products that we replace instead of repair, change spouses at a whim, etc. Where are the people that are loyal and resourceful?

I call it the MTV Effect. We want gratification within 2.5 min and then move on to the next thing. Not only are we not taken the time to develop a quality piece or relationship etc but it seems that this attitude includes broken or damaged items. Its too easy to just get another one. I fear this not only lowers the quality of the product but it lowers our expectations. We are 'happy' with a transient and translucent world. And we are slowly fading in to nothingness.

I do believe that loyalty and trying and reparations and making amends and all the things I've missed will lead to a more harmonious and productive world. It will allow us to unleash powers and emotions that we cant even imagine right now. There is a reason I use Always and Forever for things I care about. Always try. Forever a Part. I hope you can appreciate what that means. But i fear the asteroid of immediate self gratification has placed empathic producers on the extinction list.

Till next time, Be Good

Feb 23, 2018

As we sit around our TVs and decide the fate of the USA I would like to conjecture this... If we continue to erode the Constitution and the basic concepts inherit within it, we will soon find ourselves no longer a free republic. Some think that this is a good idea. Just remember what it took to get us here. As many as 24,000 Americans died on our soul to get us started. Another 600,000+ to keep our freedoms. All on our own soil. This doesnt include the other 600,000+ Americans abroad and the millions of other nationalities. And most of those deaths were with primitive weapons compared to current warfare. How many people would need to die to regain what the last 240 years have garnered for not only the USA but every country in the world has gained something from our stance.

It is not just the adults standing up and being accountable. It is their duty to the concept of freedom to instill the need for sacrifice, compromise, and responsibility upon the next generation. The efforts of past generations have allowed us to live within a unique culture, do not allow a misguided concept of kindness and sympathy to relax our vigilance!

Mar 04, 2018

So I guess I'm gonna vent a little about some personal issues that I think are becoming pervasive in society. Many of you know I have gone thru some issues the last few years. Some are things that most people go thru- divorce, laid off, surgeries, midlife, etc. When the load became too much for me, I reached out to the people calling me friend. The responses I got left me in doubt about who I was. How could someone I moved halfway across the country for think I was using them? How could someone that I would drive to their friends so they could spend the night with them say I wasn't there but the friend was their idol? How could the people I walked thru blizzards to bring them necessities not have a cup of detergent when I was out? How could no one walk my dog while I was immobilized? All these things, and many more, contribute to huge self doubt and confusion. All along, these people say I am a good person and a friend. Yet they are never there and point fingers a lot. So I began to think I was asking too much... that I hadn't been there for them or helped them. So I asked. And they disappeared. These aren't strangers on the street. These were people that I had gone thru a lot with. Some would simply not answer my messages. Some would click like. Some would have excuses like too busy to say hi. Some would offer generic responses like good luck or prayers.

So I began to doubt my interpretations of a friend. Maybe clicking like is a good friend. Maybe saying good luck is a caring friend. Maybe saying I should know they are there was enough. But something wasn't quite right. There is a difference in friend and acquaintance and neighbor. And there are expectations that go with them. If you are not gonna try to put the effort in, then why the lies? In my case, the lies are painful. Integrity is a core moral for me.

Somewhere in our past, society has got to the point that a text or a button click is considered an interaction. I don't want to belittle social media but clicking the friend button on FB doesn't make you a friend. Having a thousand FB friends or Twitter followers does not make you a good person. A friend does have obligations to a friend. Just as a neighbor does. And a family member. It can be a chore or tough at times. But that is why you use those labels. They mean something. They should be showing reality.... not a label, not a trophy, not a point to brag about.

I'm not saying that saying hi is not a good message. It does great to show you are thinking of them amongst all the other things going on. But if that is all, then you have chosen the other things to be a priority and to fill your life. But even that is not a deal buster... till the friend is at a crossroad and needs help, or guidance, or support.

So I would suggest or ask everyone, if someone moves just to be near you, or always replies, or says hi a lot, or changes their day just to support you.... use the appropriate term with them. If you are a friend, be there for them. Make the choice to make them a priority once in a while. If a neighbor, look out for each other. Share what you can. Compromise along the borders. But no matter what, be honest. Have some integrity. Make the effort even if its just to say you don't want to be in there life that way. Start having some social responsibility and stop being so concerned with yourself.

Mar 9, 2018

The news is trying to change our country, and in due course, the world. Just for sensationalism. The 2nd Amendment is NOT about self defense from criminals or civilians. It is the freedom to defend you and your community against tyranny. As tyranny grows and begins to erode your freedoms, the need for better counter measures increases.

But more immediately, why are we so entrenched in how to use a tool (a gun for example) or what it is used for instead of dealing with the outliers of society in a civilized manner? Our concern for our neighbors has diminished to the point that we are only concerned with people within our clique.

Something to consider, whats the difference in the kid that is bullied and commits suicide and the kid that is bullied and shoots his peers? And then, whats the similiarities?

Mar 15, 2018

I hope everyone is recovering from the sugar OD from yesterdays Pi Day! And keep an eye over your shoulder during the Ides of March as we prepare for My Day (St Patricks).

But I want to delve deeper in to the current political buzz word.... Gun Control. Yesterday was the Enough walk out at High Schools across the nation. I support any individuals right and need to speak up about issues important to them. This event was primarily to protest gun control laws in the US. Some people took the time to use it as a memoriam to the 17 people that died during the Marjory Stoneman Douglas High School shootings in Parkland, FL. A few used this as an excused absence from class.

I have been seeing vast support of the civic responsibility of the students using their voice to bring light to this event and subsequently the trend that seems to be getting worse. It is good to support the children of our country... and everyone. But it is also good to be real about what is being supported. And why.

I find it odd that this event has become a protest of guns. Why this case and not the one in Kentucky last month. Or the gang killings. Or abortions. There is a lot of killing occurring that can be addressed just as well. Why are we not addressing the WHY and not the HOW?

I tried to gather a few quick numbers just to see what is really going on. I found some numbers that I'll follow up shortly but using Bing and Google Search and keywords such as deaths, homicides, mortality; the first few pages of results were all related to gun violence. Even thought gun violence is not in the top 1% of annual deaths in the USA. That says a lot about the political aspect of this and not the science part. Why?

But there are over 2.5 million deaths a year in the USA. And most studies show less than 20 thousand are related to guns. That's 0.8% of deaths related to guns. A rather rough estimate since the data sources are not specific but we can assume it is relatively small. The CDC says more people die of the flu (about 2.0%). So why aren't we protesting sanitary conditions? Some studies show that nearly 40% of gun related deaths are suicides.

But lets not forget the intangibles. How many deaths are not recorded or are recorded as other conditions. Or how many lives are protected or saved by guns.

There are many ways to put statistics on the issue of violence in america and gun control. But I feel we are missing the main issue.

I'm gonna skip the statistics and details cause I want to point out a few issues. The students should be heard and their concerns taken seriously. But we should not encourage skipping responsibilities (class) to have discussions that have been going on for a long time and have no immediate answer. Some schools have threatened punishment for the walkout. I think there should be some sacrifice to make their point so this is not a bad idea. I don't think it should be long lasting or traumatic but we have got to the point that anarchy does not have repercussions. And actions don't have consequences. And that is reducing out empathy and self awareness. We are also allowing emotions to dictate the evolution of our society. I equate this to a kid wanting candy for dinner. He has firm beliefs in his opinion but is it right? Should we allow them to eat candy all the time? But this action goes further. It is not about what the child wants to do with his own actions. Its about taking the choices away from others. Not only is this a right specifically addressed in the Constitution (2nd Amendment) but is deflection of responsibility. As adults, when we say that the walkout for gun control is a good thing, we are allowing the kids to ignore the tragedy of dead people as well as blaming others for conditions that may start closer to home.

I hope we can address the underlying decay of our society before it becomes too late. Mankind will survive, but this experiment in real freedom may not. With great power comes great responsibility.

Mar 25, 2018

I wish I had some positive words of wisdom or comfort or just a distraction. But I don't. I'm not sure if its a factor of my negativity or the dire straights we are in or just a bad mood day. I suspect its a blend of all of them.

I am watching our nation die from within. Just as our sworn enemies have predicted. And the smug smiles on people as they are patted on their back by like minded people.

Mar 29, 2018

I have to apologize to start off. I was watching the "news" and strained my neck by shaking my head so much.

First curiosity, if illegal aliens (undocumented whatevers) are to be allowed to vote in our elections... why is the Russian Collusion concept such a bad idea? Isn't it just undocumented aliens campaigning for their candidate? And for that matter, why can't India or China send a few hundred million of their citizens over here to vote? We can give them health insurance, upper education, subsidized housing, etc for their contributions to our free society.

Obviously i am being sarcastic. The rest of the world abides by sovereign nation concepts so it will be easy to assume they will be instilling personalities that support their beliefs and not the ones of our founding fathers.

And we still aren't trying to figure out how to make individuals more responsible or how to keep radicals from developing into killing machines. I still have not seen any weapon get up off the couch and go down the street to kill an unsuspecting child.

I make light of this topic hoping the knee jerk reactions and stubbornness will fade a bit and progress can made in human evolution.

Apr 10, 2018

It has come to my attention that some people follow a belief that experiences equal intelligence and knowledge. Maybe this is where our society is having trouble. Experiences only give information if you are willing to accept it. It has been shown that you only interpret about 5-10% of what your senses receive. That information is then processed in to a full image. We do not gain a full picture just by doing something. We don't even gain a small part of the whole picture. It takes effort to accept the information and then more effort to garner more information just to get an interpretation. We spend so much time running from experience to experience that we don't take the time to understand what we are experiencing. And we end up misleading ourselves and others just to have an accolade of doing a lot of things.

Experiences give us information. Its what we do after that that makes the difference. Many people chalk that up as success. It may deliver muscle memory but it doesn't make you better or smarter. Taking the time and spending the effort to comprehend the information is difficult at times but that's what separates us from plankton. But that is not where it ends. That comprehension must be applied to life to gain wisdom. That's where the real strength is. Wisdom allows you to understand what to apply and when to apply it. Allows you to take your experiences and better the world around you. Allows you to stand up for what is right and be effective at it. We will never be perfect. But we can strive to get closer.

So take time to learn. To get more information. To figure out why or how.

And when someone asks for more info - be it how are you or whats the mass of neutronium- see that as your opportunity to help someone better the world. When someone asks for clarity, you have a unique ability to enhance the world. For not everyone cares enough to ask your opinion or even to make the world a better place.

May 4, 2018

Hello again. It seems the world is becoming more divided and people are becoming more entrenched in their own beliefs. In a utopian or maybe a nomadic world this may work. But we benefit from living in a civilized society. And that means everyone cant have everything. Perhaps a utopian world that is possible but we aren't there. And that implies we must change or grow to reach that plateau. I doubt i will get there, but i can help the next generation get one step closer.

Its been brought to my attention I should change, not react to conflict. Shouldn't it be that the ones who have done something to hurt me should change? If I let it go, am I not condoning the behavior? Wouldn't it be a better solution to speak up? Make it clear what is up? Find a compromise (assuming both sides believe in their side- many times one side doesn't realize what they are actually doing)? Maybe the world would be a better place when people start talking TO each other rather than AT each other. How else are actions gonna match up with intent?

Im not saying that I'm right. Or that you are wrong. It's saying that we aren't acting in harmony. I believe that people are generally good. That we are all learning how to grow. But we are human and can be naive. I see it as a blessing that we have the combination of speech and free thought. There's a reason for everything and I believe these two things exist so we can dream new ideas and be able to share them with others so they're dreams can be combined to make a greater concept.

Anyway, back to avoiding chores but please remember that evolution is inevitable so lets try to make it the best we can.

May 22, 2018

Just a quick personal note. There are many things that lead to depression or anxiety. Moving, being fired, personal loss, illness, being cheated on, traumatic events in general etc. I've been thru all these in the last few years. They've worn me out but didn't stop me. The one I haven't figured out how to get by is having someone you care about be harmed under your care in your own home. And there's no one to turn to for help on something like that. You try to overshadow the negative with positive but then I got pretty sick which led to more problems. And when you reach out to the ones that you relied on, who might have solutions, who said they'd be there they don't understand how to help. The next thing you know, there's no one to even say hi to. It snowballs from there. I don't have the personality to give up... on people, on goals, on hope... but when you are immobilized with pain or delirious with fever and the only thing left is a random 'good luck with that' the hope dissolves. I could go on for a long time with anecdotes and innuendos but it doesn't change reality. Those that can AND want to will try to make a difference and I thank them in advance for the effort. I have watched people die. I have watched others suffer. And I have survived all kinds of events that should have killed me. I will figure it out or it will kill me. But I have been told many times that I'm too stubborn so I'm guessing I'm going to be too stubborn to accept less than magic. I hope part of my dream comes true but if it doesn't, maybe some one else can benefit from whatever wisdom I may discover.

May 29, 2018

So, Today I was listening to the radio on the way to work. The topic of the day was the declining birth rate amongst younger Americans. I think this is a good thing overall but only from a statistical point of view... and that's not what I want to discuss today. The speaker claimed that the high cost of raising a child, the negative impacts within society (lower wages, spurned by the business world, 'sacrifices' of child care), and the heavy cost to young adults was dramatically altering a persons desire to have a child. I have lots of issues with this. When did it become a sacrifice to choose a lifestyle of providing for a child vs climbing the corporate ladder? I understand that it is a hard decision for some but why do we look down on stay at home parents? I say parent cause I am willing to accept that a male can raise a child nearly as well as a female, primarily due to females becoming less likely to be proud of raising capable offspring. I also have an issue with placing a monetary value on children. Raising a kid cant be equated to a better job or college tuition or 'necessary' toys. I do not have biological children but the few that I consider my own, I hope they are better off with my attention and my attempts to provide wisdom. Instead of a new hoverboard or $200 sneakers etc. The items and events we are showering our youth with are no longer about making them successful people but about momentary euphoria. The euphoria wears off and a new injection of external stimuli is applied. I don't see a child being jubilant cause of his success or just knowing they did their best. They are more and more looking for some external display of them doing well. Then they grow up to parents that need external approval to feel successful enough to love a child. As our population embraces this 'feel good' strategy, the populace gets less and less empathic. I watch random violence increase while the local governments claim that violence is down. I watch more people demand recognition or reward for menial tasks. I watch the disagreements become who can be the loudest and most annoying.

I believe the future needs more attempts to understand another's choice. Some people want to raise kids or be a janitor or be the president. And with those choices come sacrifices and compromise that are not negative. It is an American privilege to be able to choose what to sacrifice. What to like and not like. What to be proud of.

Sep 11, 2018

On such a day as today, I can't help but remember that despite all the good intentions in the world, Evil exists and comes in many forms. It is easy to see on days like 09-11-01 (amongst many others).

When you want to have something to aspire to, remember the people that ran TOWARDS disaster to help anyone they can.

None asked who the victims were.

All responded to an atrocious act.

On that day, everyone was grey and faceless.

Many have chosen to be 'courageous' and make a statement about discrimination or privilege or the multitudes of hardships that a free nation endures. I can't acknowledge them while they want to forget the thousands that have died to create the oppurtunity to dream.

On this day, and every day; the people that stand for integrity, loyalty, self sacrifice, hope, and what I consider the American Way are the people I will thank. I am grateful they exist and I have been blessed to know a few.

I have their backs.

And I stand with them.

Sep 27, 2018

I won't buffer this post so make sure you know who is reading this.

The Supreme Court Hearings are going on today. I will say up front that i have not seen or read the entire transcript. I will say I have witnessed enough to enrage me, make me sick to my core, and begin to loose hope for humanity. This process is EVIL. It is not about doing whats right or following the letter of the law but is designed to gain power for a small group of individuals.

The allegations by the accuser are disheartening and I hope she finds closure. This in no way lessons the atrocity that surrounds this fiasco. We are truly using malicious methods to achieve policy gains. The process is an embarrassment to our legal system and the way our country has survived for centuries.

It is your prerogative to believe the accuser. That right has been defended in courts and battlefields and bars for as long as we have been a nation. You can even choose to blacklist and avoid the accused. If you are that kind of person, you need to look deep within yourself. I dont even consider you human. Because someone that will eviscerate a fellow being on hearsay is not humane. And humanity is a major part of what makes us human. Destroying a person and that persons life so that you can feel vindicated on a BELIEF is uncivil and I consider immoral. We have abandoned a lawful society to appease individual agendas. I have always made it clear that I consider manipulation and lying as despicable characteristics. Following those traits for personal gain is infinitely worse. And here we are in a society that is screaming to be just that.

Lets be perfectly clear, this is not for the well being of the accuser. It is not about trying to keep an unfit nominee being confirmed. It is about destroying a way of life to keep a few people in power. Threats and harassment on the accused is tribal and sinful. If you are supporting this, you have abandoned the American way. You have turned your back on morality and civility. All to embolden your personal beliefs. You should be ashamed and may God have mercy on your soul.

We won't delve in to the realities and the legal system and emotional issues and the many avenues that should be the topic of an advanced, civilized society. We won''t expand on choosing sides on people and factions that we aren't informed about. We won't delve in to the bipartisan focus that has divided our nation.

I will leave you with this, many people are adamantly content to destroy a man, his family, and friends in order to reinforce their anger. That is atrocious. The growing righteousness and antipathy to a civilized and christian way of life is disheartening.

Dec 18, 2018

As the year draws ever closer to the end, I find myself pondering life. This will be simple and to the point. I listen to people say that life is cruel and they are sad because a friend or family member has succumbed to life's trials. That they are gone. Many of the people saying this are avid followers of God or a religion.

They are not gone. They have gone ahead. They are waiting for you on the next stage of your soulful journey. The ones that don't reply to messages or share their life with you, they are the ones that are gone. They have chosen a path that you are not on. Recognize the difference.

Mortal life is finite. Choices are made all the time. You don't have to be in the same room as someone to make them feel a part of your life. Keep people close before they drift too far away to meet on the other side.

Jan 11, 2020

Its been a while, partially because we haven't isolated the health issues but mostly because daily life was a struggle. That's a different blog.

I have finally accepted that the last few years has been based on a lie. Society does not encourage integrity and loyalty and accountability and hope. It idolizes self success and materialism.

Jul 25, 2020

OK, So I suck at blogging. But things aren't as simple as they seem. A new job, a pandemic, a death of my best friend, and more insanity around the world. It really has taken the last bit of hope from me. The hypocrisy and hate is everywhere. The USA as I grew up understanding it has waned to the point of barely existing. And it's still under attack by idealogists. I don't begrudge their hopes, just that they have to destroy to feel any worth in their lives. More later as I hope to get back in to blogging. Maybe I need a better app. Maybe I need a coed tutor. Maybe I need maybelline.